Where did you find such a fetching picture of me?Donkey wrote:BLZDub wrote:Ah shucks. I have only met you in dark clubs, in the natural light I'm hideous. My hands are huge though...?
Great chat up lines
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"Shall we skip all this talking stuff and just go grab a cab now"
SoundcloudSoulstep wrote: My point is i just wanna hear more vibes
- HamCrescendo
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- Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2008 9:11 pm
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This had probably been said, but you know how when theres two girls out on a night out, one is fit and one really isnt.
You go up to the ugly one and ask "Would you like to dance?" Not believing her luck she'll stand up and say "Yes!" which is when you say "Well fuck off and do it then so I can talk to your mate."
You go up to the ugly one and ask "Would you like to dance?" Not believing her luck she'll stand up and say "Yes!" which is when you say "Well fuck off and do it then so I can talk to your mate."
or if there is 2 fat girls, its normally customary to shoutDanRev wrote:This had probably been said, but you know how when theres two girls out on a night out, one is fit and one really isnt.
You go up to the ugly one and ask "Would you like to dance?" Not believing her luck she'll stand up and say "Yes!" which is when you say "Well fuck off and do it then so I can talk to your mate."
"oi sugar, not you the other lump!"
DISCLAIMER: THIS IS A JOKE, PLEASE DONT TAKE OFFENCE..
Re: Great chat up lines
BUMP.
For diss' (and my) delight.
For diss' (and my) delight.
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djelements
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Re: Great chat up lines
Great thread.
http://soundcloud.com/helixdelay
kejk wrote:I prefer the pooper
Re: Great chat up lines
If i flip a coin whats the chance of me getting head?
quatagwangwa wrote:you and crackf are the most coolest
Re: Great chat up lines
I only ever come to this forum to read this thread when I have a date coming up.
"Do you like dry biscuits? Then eat this... *gets out penis* it's a cracker"
"Do you like dry biscuits? Then eat this... *gets out penis* it's a cracker"
Parson wrote:...and then God said unto Eve, "Have some of that, slag."
Re:
stanton wrote:Upon approaching a lady of diminutive stature one should compliment her on slenderness and aesthetically pleasing ambience, reassuring her that height is not an issue and that polite gentlemen, such as yourself, have a great fondness for ladies of a petite nature.
If this approach seems to be winning favour, then take the afore mentioned lady for a drink and continue to compliment her on her appearance and general demure.
At this juncture one should now begin to lay focus upon specific parts of the ladies body, especially the hands. Perhaps make a playful comparison between your hands and hers, just for fun but to also show how manly you are.
This is the crux of the chat up situation, this is when you need to make your move. Whilst complimenting her on her meagre hand span, use these exact words...
"My dick would look massive in your hands."
Guaranteed to work.
Co-authored by Misters Stanton and BLZDub, 27-05-08
oh my, too much
Soundclouddubplateguy wrote:try using your juicy boner.
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particle-jim
- Posts: 10747
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- Contact:
Re: Re:
AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAAAAA i gotta remember that 1 for the future, spesh coz i do have a thing for the smaller womanstanton wrote:Upon approaching a lady of diminutive stature one should compliment her on slenderness and aesthetically pleasing ambience, reassuring her that height is not an issue and that polite gentlemen, such as yourself, have a great fondness for ladies of a petite nature.
If this approach seems to be winning favour, then take the afore mentioned lady for a drink and continue to compliment her on her appearance and general demure.
At this juncture one should now begin to lay focus upon specific parts of the ladies body, especially the hands. Perhaps make a playful comparison between your hands and hers, just for fun but to also show how manly you are.
This is the crux of the chat up situation, this is when you need to make your move. Whilst complimenting her on her meagre hand span, use these exact words...
"My dick would look massive in your hands."
Guaranteed to work.
http://www.soundcloud.com/particleimami wrote:i put secret donks in all my tunes, just low enough so you can't hear them
http://www.mixcloud.com/particlejim
Re: Great chat up lines
"Shit I ain't really tryna fuck, I just want some head."
My dad told me the story of a friend of his who once went up to a girl who had repeatedly turned down legions of sweaty suitors, poured some of her beer (!!!) into his cup and said...
"I'd really like to bite you on the ass."
Being a woman of high standards, she replied with "Can we finish our beers first?"
Absolute legend.
My dad told me the story of a friend of his who once went up to a girl who had repeatedly turned down legions of sweaty suitors, poured some of her beer (!!!) into his cup and said...
"I'd really like to bite you on the ass."
Being a woman of high standards, she replied with "Can we finish our beers first?"
Absolute legend.
fuck off


















Re: Great chat up lines
My mate once went up to a girl and said "ever had your boobs weighed?"
She said no
He proceeded to bounce them about with his hands and go "waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!"
She said no
He proceeded to bounce them about with his hands and go "waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!"
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