things that have made you happy today

[nowaysj]

And it's also creates a dilemma. Do you want to be cool in the eyes of your daughter and losing the permission to have sex. Or do you want to be uncool, but still having the abilty to get laid after a hard day's work?

hes married, he doesn't have sex.

It's generally true. I turned down sex last night and opted for the warm embrace of a downy pillow instead.

BUT, it is not because we're married and fuddy duddies, it is because our bedroom shares a wall with my daughter's room and my wife is a fucking screamer. I don't think my daughter would sleep soundly if it sounded like I was killing her mother every night... woe is me.

But then it will be the best 'your moms' joke ever.

Ur mom is such a screamer, every time i fuck her the whole neighbourhood hears it.

At university we used to live in a three story building with an interior courtyard lined with balconies. People used to come out onto the balconies and cheer us on when we fucked. They'd set up chairs. They didn't know who we were, but it was the talk of the building. People called her Moana (which I suppose is apt as her sexual energy runs as deep and wide as the ocean itself), and had her pegged as this red head that lived in our building.

Nwj True Story # 137

prime story #, btw

[garethom]

your mom is such a screamer, they made a film about her called scream 2

your mom is such a screamer, that I bummed her over the midnight request line

[nowaysj]

your mom is such a screamer, that I bummed her over the midnight request line

[ezza]

ok mom jokes r sick

whos gonna do the honours.... ?

[garethom]

ok mom jokes r sick

whos gonna do the honours.... ?

Think my all time favourite is:

Your mom is so fat, that she stepped out in front of my car and I ran out of petrol swerving round her.

Dunno what it was like at other schools, but at mine, kids would wanna fight you if you just said "Your mom" in the end. Just two meaningless words.

[m8son666]

i think we need pictures in order to make effective jokes about ur wife noways

[ezza]

ok mom jokes r sick

whos gonna do the honours.... ?

Think my all time favourite is:

Your mom is so fat, that she stepped out in front of my car and I ran out of petrol swerving round her.

Dunno what it was like at other schools, but at mine, kids would wanna fight you if you just said "Your mom" in the end. Just two meaningless words.

yeah 'your mom' was the final like fuck it we're gonna fight

[nowaysj]

i think we need pictures in order to make effective jokes about ur wife noways

Temporary placeholder, hold on.

[ezza]

ill big u up so hard if u actually post a pic of ur wife

[nowaysj]

[nowaysj]

There you go.

[Nihilism]

Silence.

[didi]

first football training after xmas

lungs still burning

i hate fitness so much

but i wanna be sick at football

ffs

[didi]

probably posting in the wrong thread

was happy tho, i was starting to miss it

[iirrriiieee]

[ezza]

lol just saw someone post that on fb

[kidshuffle]

agent do u know this girl? you seem to know girls who poop in public

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/83267511/

[titchbit]

that's cos agent knows everyone who poops in public.

[alphacat]

Satanists unveil proposed statue for Oklahoma state capitol
...7-foot tall goat-headed Baphomet deserves a place on state grounds

[chekov]

i'd forgotten oklahoma existed