The story of Charizard.

[Jhonny2x4]

Charizard finds out his license is about to expire and needs to go to the DMV in order to get it renewed. He packs his required documentation into a manilla envelope, drives to the DMV, and grabs a number. The DMV is packed well beyond the maximum capacity. He sits down on an array of plastic chairs against the wall, puzzled why no one has taken the seat.

On his right is a homeless irishman who can't see, to his left is a french deaf mime. Sitting in front of him is a gypsy woman who cant stop flaring her nostrils at the mime. Charizard sits akwardly between the two for 3 hours. He looks at the display on the ceiling, noticing he is next in the queue. He double checks his documentation in the manilla envelope, only to realize he has forgotten 2 forms of ID.

His number is called. As Charizard gets up, the mime shoots out of his chair and grasps Charizards hand firmly. Charizard's concentration is unbroken, focusing on the DMV associate behind the counter, giving him a cold stare. Charizard and the french mime approach the desk with a slow ridged scuffle. The blind irishman is spooked by the gypsy and jumps on charizards shoulders with grace of an olympic zimbabwe figure skater.

The DMV associate asks Charizard the purpose of his visit. Charizard replies, "I need to renew my license".

DMV associate: "Do you have 2 forms of photo identification?"

Charizard: "I forgot them at home, I have utility bills..."

DMV associate: "Im sorry but I cant help you, you need to have 2 forms of photo ID"

The irishman is hot and bothered from the sound of the gypsy woman's flaring nostrils.

Charizard responds:

[OGLemon]

fuckin gyppos stealin me benefits

[ehbes]

[particle-jim]

DMV associate: "Do you have 2 forms of photo identification?"

Charizard: "I forgot them at home, I have utility bills..."

DMV associate: "Im sorry but I cant help you, you need to have 2 forms of photo ID"

The irishman is hot and bothered from the sound of the gypsy woman's flaring nostrils.

Charizard responds:

"please can you just help me, I've been queuing for ages and I just want this to be dealt with as soon as possible, please don't make this process drag on"

[rockonin]

Charizard responds:

Lets not turn this into a beastiality crime scene.

[skimpi]

what on earth is this?

[Jhonny2x4]

"Please can you just help me, I've been queuing for ages and I just want this to be dealt with as soon as possible, please don't make this process drag on...", groaned Charizard.

The DMV associate responded, "I'n sorry sir but there is nothing I can do. Please come back when you have 2 forms of identification.

Charizard's claws dig into the mimes hand. The mime is unmoved, smelling the hot-buttery pretzel stand being run by the mexicans outside. The mime begins to drool, smudging the face paint near the corners of his mouth.

Charizard looks deep into the DMV associates eyes and whispers, "Lets not turn this into a beastiality crime scene."

The DMV associate looks over to one of the security guards and asks to have him removed. Smoke sifts out of Charizards nose, burning the ghostly stare of the irishman's eyes.

Charizard spans his wings and does a loopty-loop burning the face off the associate.



The irishman is flung into the air and is caught by the gypsy woman. .People jump out of their seats in terror running for their lives. The security guard shits himself and runs to the bathroom. The mexicans remain outside aggressively selling their pretzels. Charizard throws the mime on his back and bursts through the roof, knocking chunks of plaster on the cold white tile of the once mundane DMV.

He rushes to his section 8 apartment on the second floor and locks the door behind him. As his eyes dart around his apartment, he notices two letters he left scattered on his cheap living room coffee table. He opens the first one, revealing that his unpaid dental visit last year has winded him in collections. He opens the second letter revelaing he's been summoned to show up at small-claims court for neglecting to pay for the damages of his ex-bossess car.

The mimes legs grow numb.

Charizard thinks to himself:

[dickman69]

nah

[Jhonny2x4]

"That asshole rayman never fessed up that it was him who damamaged the bossess car."

Charizard was furious on how shitty his day was going. Charizard left the mime in the corner and quickly ran to pay rayman a visit.
2 hours later, Charizard had made it to rayman's place, only to notice that he had left his bicycle outside unnatended. He scorched his bike till there was nothing left but melted chains on the sidewalk. Charizard vanished back to his apartment.

An hour later, rayman looked at his precious bike through his teary eye and was like, "nah...".

Rayman was so torn up, he fled to dubstepforum and posted:





* not srs. *

[rockonin]

Charizard thinks to himself:

If I amputate the mimes legs and sell them on the black market I'll be able to pay my dental bill and and compensate my ex boss.

After meeting with sexy ass denstist and paying her, her owed money, I asked her if she wanted to "queef on my chief beef". I repaid her by giving her a pearl necklace.

[wysockisauce]

Waste of time. Should have just gone for FAA certification.

[dickman69]

i aint even got a bike

[Jhonny2x4]

"I ain't even got a bike", rayman replies to the magnificent Jhonny2x4's thread: "Dude, I sleep with like, 5 different women each night because they love my code". This is irrelevant to Jhonny2x4 because he is unaware of how rayman is in denial of his favorite bike from childhood had been burnt to ash. Rayman slams his cold closed fist on his desk causing his small tower of change to topple over.

He walks over to his window to stare at the pile of melted dreams, clutching onto a piece of the chain that he had pulled from the wreckage. He looks at the chain in his hand and snarls through his teeth, "I will have my revenge...

Meanwhile, Charizard is pacing back and fourth trying to figure out what to do. The mime is sitting on his couch admiring his matrioshka doll collection.

"I'm already in this deep, maybe if I amputate the mime's legs and sell them on the black market I'll be able to pay my dental bill and and compensate my ex boss.

Charizard slowly turns his head in the mimes direction. The mime is too busy being fixated on the wooden dolls. "It's best I do this quick..." decides Charizard. Charizard locks the front door with a subtle 'click'. He casually walks over to his adjacent kitchen and slowly pulls out the washrag hanging over the stove handle. The mime catches Charizards orange looming silouette in the corner of his eye growing larger as he inches nearer. Charizard grabs the mime by his neck and draws the washrag to gag the mime. The mime forms the expression of a scream, but no noise escapes. Charizard stops for a brief second and slowly lets the rag slip from his hand to the floor. "I don't think I'll need to use this..." says charizard, smiling with whatever sanity he had left.

A day later, Charizard navigates his way through the back alleys till he reaches the building where his dentists office is. He looks at the directory.

"201", Charizard murmurs.

After a short elevator ride, he walks into the dentists office. The receptionist was gone and the waiting room was empty. "Is it a holiday?" Charizard questions himself. He turns the knob of the door to the dentists work area. Unlocked. He slowly enters. He peers his head around the corner of the red painted wall.

"Chad?" A sweet feminine voice flutters down the hall. "Chad, is that you?"

Charizard turn around to see a big black nurse waddling towards him. The sound of friction from her bunion sliding against the duct-taped carpet whispered through the office.

"Hello Burt." said Charizard. Burt halts in front of Carizard with a big smile. "I'm suprised to see you Chad, I was wondering when you were going to show up again." said Burt.

Charizard: "I told you to not call me Chad."

Burt: "I told you several times to pay me but it looks like that's too difficult."

Charizard: "I didn't have the money, but now I do."

Burt: "And where is it?"

Charizard: "I made the payment this morning."

Burt: "Then why did you come down to see me?"

Charizard looks down at Burt's bunion.

"When are you going to get that removed?" asks Charizard, "it doesn't suit you Burt."

"It's Burtina now." she snaps.

...
BURT RECEIVED A PEARL NECKLACE!
BURT PUT PEARL NECKLACE IN HER INVENTORY

*Id like to get dark with this but its against teh rulez
...

An hour later, Charizard wipes the sweat from his forehead as he returns to the lobby. Rayman is waiting outside for him with a group of ninjas. There's only one exit to the building. Charizard contemplates his next move, knowing it may be his last...

[NickUndercover]

Charizard goes to the front office, asks for the phone and calls his pal Gyarados. After all, they do have a history defeating the Elite 4 together. Rayman shouldn't be that much of a problem