How do you stop a Rhino from Charging?

deamonds · Post by **deamonds** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:18 am

Unplug Him

*Coat falls into my hands as i make a swift exit for the door all in 1 motion*

LEQ · Post by **LEQ** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:22 am

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh.

deamonds · Post by **deamonds** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:23 am

what do you call a lesbo dinasour?

lickalotapus

LEQ · Post by **LEQ** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:25 am

What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a plate?
A tyrannosaucer.

deamonds · Post by **deamonds** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:29 am

"Doctor, I can't pronounce my F's, T's and H's."
"Well you can't say fairer than that then"

LEQ · Post by **LEQ** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:32 am

I phoned the local ramblers club today, but the bloke who answered just went on and on...

kins83 · Post by **kins83** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:32 am

What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?

A do-you-think-he-saw-us.

LEQ · Post by **LEQ** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:37 am

fancied a game of darts with my mate.
He said, "Nearest the bull goes first"
He went "Baah" and I went "Moo"
He said "You're closest'.

elbe · Post by **elbe** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:39 am

why did the orange stop rolling?

...because it realised that it had no fingers to roll with, or mouth and lungs to smoke with if by some miracle it did manage to roll, or any form of brain or central nervous system in order to start the thought process of rolling let alone get some kind of enjoyment out the effects of smoking if it did somehow manage to roll and smoke.

deamonds · Post by **deamonds** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:49 am

- Knock, knock.
- Who's there?
- An Irish burglar.

^btxl · Post by **^btxl** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:49 am

What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.

LEQ · Post by **LEQ** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:56 am

Man out walking two dogs. A woman says to him, "Are they Jack Russells?"
The man replies, "No, they're mine"

deamonds · Post by **deamonds** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:58 am

a lobster walks into a bar, the bartender tells him straight away to do 1...
the crab sitting there says, "wah b, homie?"
tender says "well, he was giving it all that (lobster hand motion) wernt he!!"

LEQ · Post by **LEQ** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:59 am

What do you call 100 nuns in a shop?
Virgin megastore

deamonds · Post by **deamonds** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 11:08 am

whats pink & fluffy? pink fluff

blue & fluffy?

pink fluff holding its breath

BLZDub · Post by **BLZDub** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 12:18 pm

What's blue and fucks old people?

hypothermia

bagelator · Post by **bagelator** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 12:33 pm

what do you call a man with 100 rabbits up his arse.

warren

BLZDub · Post by **BLZDub** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 12:35 pm

What's the difference between a Ferrari and 10 dead babies?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

pdomino · Post by **pdomino** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 12:41 pm

All Boomnoise asked for was a little good-night kiss, but Mary Ann haughtily rebuffed him with, "I don't do that sort of thing on my first date!"

"Well," Boomy replied with sarcasm, "how about on your last date?"

LEQ · Post by **LEQ** » Thu Nov 06, 2008 12:49 pm

How many surrealists does it take to change a light-bulb?
A Fish.

How do you make anti-freeze?

Take away her blanket.

How do you stop a Rhino from Charging?

How do you stop a Rhino from Charging?

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