ahier wrote:so i need a shit all day. not too desperate at work, and new job, so think ill hold it off til i get home and really relish it.
end up not going home straightaway, meet friends who have been at cricket match for a pint. have two dark ales, feel pleased cos that will really getthe ball rolling. scope pub toilets, definitelynot shitable in and no toilet paper. no biggie, we are going to get train home now.
miss train number 1. starting to get aggy now, stomach is making itself known. wait half hour for next train. half hour train ridehome, as stomach is really letting me know its ready. lift from station to home is late. get home, realise friend is wanting me to drive him home, via dealer. get in car, drive. dealer is late, standard. drive twenty minuteround trip to his, feeling like i could shit myself any second. get home, go to toilet. walk in the door and realise builders have been in, and my own throne is no longer in existence. go downstairs to shitty tiny cramped toilet, prepare the bowl sit down.
nothing.
WTF
i feel your pain... i too have suffered this many times in the past, nothing worse
also shitting in the crouched position is simply the best way to shit, they just pop right out, shame we dont have those crouch toilets in the west, or the bum-guns
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:12 am
by firky
ahier wrote:so i need a shit all day. not too desperate at work, and new job, so think ill hold it off til i get home and really relish it.
end up not going home straightaway, meet friends who have been at cricket match for a pint. have two dark ales, feel pleased cos that will really getthe ball rolling. scope pub toilets, definitelynot shitable in and no toilet paper. no biggie, we are going to get train home now.
miss train number 1. starting to get aggy now, stomach is making itself known. wait half hour for next train. half hour train ridehome, as stomach is really letting me know its ready. lift from station to home is late. get home, realise friend is wanting me to drive him home, via dealer. get in car, drive. dealer is late, standard. drive twenty minuteround trip to his, feeling like i could shit myself any second. get home, go to toilet. walk in the door and realise builders have been in, and my own throne is no longer in existence. go downstairs to shitty tiny cramped toilet, prepare the bowl sit down.
nothing.
WTF
I got barred from a pub for taking a shit in the men's urinals because the toilet was fucked. I had massive stomach cramps and had been holding on for about two hours on a bus. Horrible dull aching agony.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:13 am
by firky
noam wrote:
also shitting in the crouched position is simply the best way to shit, they just pop right out, shame we dont have those crouch toilets in the west, or the bum-guns
imagine if ya misses caught you taking a shit like this, bollocks hanging out the front and shit hanging out the back.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:15 am
by noam
fap???
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:17 am
by hasezwei
firky wrote:
noam wrote:
also shitting in the crouched position is simply the best way to shit, they just pop right out, shame we dont have those crouch toilets in the west, or the bum-guns
imagine if ya misses caught you taking a shit like this, bollocks hanging out the front and shit hanging out the back.
at first i read "either shitting or squatting" just because of the amount of shit in this thread.
oh and i had a poop and now my stomach hurts.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:34 am
by Atac
Some kid back in highschool shit his pants one day in class. He literally walked out of class and laid down in the hallway for a solid hour.
During passing period people were freaking out because it seemed like someone had shit themselves and then just dropped dead.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:42 am
by firky
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 12:51 am
by hasezwei
Atac wrote:Some kid back in highschool shit his pants one day in class. He literally walked out of class and laid down in the hallway for a solid hour.
During passing period people were freaking out because it seemed like someone had shit themselves and then just dropped dead.
why'd he lay down tho?
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 1:06 am
by oprs
hasezwei wrote:
Atac wrote:Some kid back in highschool shit his pants one day in class. He literally walked out of class and laid down in the hallway for a solid hour.
During passing period people were freaking out because it seemed like someone had shit themselves and then just dropped dead.
why'd he lay down tho?
thats a boss. fuck yall im gonna shit myself and go take a nap, deal with it
not gonna lie laughed for a good 5 minutes at this one
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 1:25 am
by wormcode
oprs wrote:
hasezwei wrote:
Atac wrote:Some kid back in highschool shit his pants one day in class. He literally walked out of class and laid down in the hallway for a solid hour.
During passing period people were freaking out because it seemed like someone had shit themselves and then just dropped dead.
why'd he lay down tho?
thats a boss. fuck yall im gonna shit myself and go take a nap, deal with it
not gonna lie laughed for a good 5 minutes at this one
I foresee a new trend. Pooplank?
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 1:42 am
by firky
Atac wrote:Some kid back in highschool shit his pants one day in class. He literally walked out of class and laid down in the hallway for a solid hour.
During passing period people were freaking out because it seemed like someone had shit themselves and then just dropped dead.
So that's what the dude says in the Just video.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 11:30 am
by firky
I am still to do have a movement today. I ate very little yesterday which may explain my lack of pre-noon pooing.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 4:25 pm
by kidshuffle
sd5 wrote:
kidshuffle wrote:I just took another poop. Thank you for reminding me to poop, thread
this thread turned to (sloppy) shit after this.
but imo,
defaecation leads to enlightenment.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 7:09 pm
by faust.dtc
firky wrote:
wormcode wrote:I foresee a new trend. Pooplank?
Ive actually already invented a similar new trend but I have yet to put it into practice. Its called 'pigeoning'.
Its similar to owling, you find a high perch and adopt a pose like that in firkys pic above however the difference is that you then drop your trousers and shit on whatever is below you.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 8:39 pm
by Atac
wormcode wrote:
oprs wrote:
hasezwei wrote:
Atac wrote:Some kid back in highschool shit his pants one day in class. He literally walked out of class and laid down in the hallway for a solid hour.
During passing period people were freaking out because it seemed like someone had shit themselves and then just dropped dead.
why'd he lay down tho?
thats a boss. fuck yall im gonna shit myself and go take a nap, deal with it
not gonna lie laughed for a good 5 minutes at this one
I foresee a new trend. Pooplank?
No idea why he laid down. I think he just accepted the embarrassment and surrendered his social life in one swift pooplank.
I really felt bad for the kid but it was just impossible to not laugh at everyone's reactions. You see them walk up all curious and what not, the look when they realize what happened is just priceless.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 11:02 pm
by hasezwei
HOLY FUCKING SHIT THERE WAS A SPIDER ON MY TOILET PAPER WHAT THE FUCK MAN
SHIT I WTF WHY WHY WHY
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 11:51 pm
by Gewze
hasezwei wrote:HOLY FUCKING SHIT THERE WAS A SPIDER ON MY TOILET PAPER WHAT THE FUCK MAN
SHIT I WTF WHY WHY WHY
cover the bastard in shit
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Tue Jul 26, 2011 11:55 pm
by therzbm
on the subject of toilet habits and techniques, id like to say big up for sit down piss. why take the time to aim and support your body weight like a chump when you can just sit down and take it easy with no worries of missing the bowl.
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Wed Jul 27, 2011 2:41 am
by noam
a kid in my old school pissed his pants in year 7 (first year high school for you non-english), it was in French, the teacher denied him about 10 times going to the toilet so he had no choice
his name was Jonny Blower (seriously)
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
and he pissed his pants in year 7 french
Re: Post here when you have had a poo
Posted: Wed Jul 27, 2011 3:13 am
by wormcode
noam wrote:a kid in my old school pissed his pants in year 7 (first year high school for you non-english), it was in French, the teacher denied him about 10 times going to the toilet so he had no choice
his name was Jonny Blower (seriously)
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
his name was Jonny Blower
and he pissed his pants in year 7 french
I feel his pain. Similar thing happened to me when I was about 7/8 at school. The teacher was making me stand in the corner as punishment and wouldn't let me go to the toilet no matter how many times I asked. Finally she did but it was too late and I let it go too soon. I ended up just walking home and took a bath then watched Ninja Turtles. Luckily I lived not more than 2 blocks away. Fuck her though.
