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Ah what can I say Depone. Music is keeping me occupied and sane at the minute. Just keep going, DSFers are backing you.

Hang tough bruv!

cheers guys. to be honest, it felt really weird putting that down on a public dubstep forum
But I needed to vent. Its been real tough, and have never had to deal with a mental illness. For the last 4 months i have not felt myself at all, but im getting somewhere, slowly and surely

Pretty brave to put this on a public forum indeed, but i'm sure it feels as some sort of relief..
Hang on man let the music get you through the hard times
i hope it inspires you in some way too!

stick in there buddy

I read the title as Depones vent...was hoping for a dirty pic but oooo well

Aww man, sucks to hear you're suffering with that shit... must be so debilitating

Glad you're on the mend though!! Get well soon chap!


Dub Fiend

Depone wrote:cheers guys. to be honest, it felt really weird putting that down on a public dubstep forum
But I needed to vent. Its been real tough, and have never had to deal with a mental illness. For the last 4 months i have not felt myself at all, but im getting somewhere, slowly and surely

So ur saying it's down to a mental health problem? Because, no shit, this happens to me every so often, where my chest feels like it's gradually getting tighter, and I start to get a tingly feeling in my throat and face and then start panicking and hyperventilating, but not as extreme as yours sounds. It's hard to tell people it's happenning to you, because I kind of freeze up and can't really talk.

It comes and goes and has been doing do for about three or four years. I just thought it was a mild allergic reaction to something, causing me to panick!

I've just been kinda trying to ignore it, lol.

Hope you're ok pal.

Glad to hear you're starting to feel better... keep up man, hope your 100% soon.

you got support and respect on here man. your tunes are top notch, youre production videos were thoro and informative, you seem like a generally good dude. pretty amazing how productive youve been, never would have guessed you were sick. stay up.

Glad to hear you're finding a way UP!
And there will be more opportunities re. missing your slot at carbon logic's 3rd Birthday.
Will be in touch this week re. The Grassroots LP is going out digitally worldwide on 25th March.

respect and regards
bigfeet (i.e pete)

Sincere best wishes Depone - top fella and top producer.

wayoftheworld wrote: i noticed a biiig diference when i started eating healthy clean and natural foods and shit

I ain't eating shit for anyone, I don't care how healthy it is

You dead yet?

I know how you feel mate I have to deal with similar shit, I was diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder and I can't go through a day without being prang about something, usually to do with my health... But if there's something to worry about, I'll worry about it. So my body is always kicking out because my mind can't settle. I've found distraction to be the best remedy, as hard as it is... Especially during an attack because the more you think about how you feel the more it takes control of you.
Big ups to you for sharing about your issues on here man, I hate having to tell people I suffer with 'anxiety' because I'm not an anxious person who doesn't speak to anybody and bites his nails in the corner and all that melarchy, it's always normal people who suffer with this shit, usually the more knowledgeable of us because we know about the crap in life that other people choose to ignore.
Don't let it eat you though geezer, the fact you have mental health issues doesn't mean that you can't control it. If you fall into the trap of thinking that you're feeling bad because you have something wrong with you, it's going to be hard to pull yourself out, the best thing you can do is focus on improving the imperfections of your life and putting them in the past.

Hope you get better man, and big up again for those production videos you did

Thanks to all for your concern. For a while i felt really isolated and strange. Happened just before christmas, and i couldnt even manage sitting at a dinner table with my famlily. That would be enough to trigger an attack and i had to just watch tv or something to chill me out. Used to have to go for 20 min walks feeling Konked out my head (really feel high as fuck like i have double dropped some pills), that sorted me out.

wirez wrote:I know how you feel mate I have to deal with similar shit, I was diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder and I can't go through a day without being prang about something, usually to do with my health... But if there's something to worry about, I'll worry about it. So my body is always kicking out because my mind can't settle. I've found distraction to be the best remedy, as hard as it is... Especially during an attack because the more you think about how you feel the more it takes control of you.
Big ups to you for sharing about your issues on here man, I hate having to tell people I suffer with 'anxiety' because I'm not an anxious person who doesn't speak to anybody and bites his nails in the corner and all that melarchy, it's always normal people who suffer with this shit, usually the more knowledgeable of us because we know about the crap in life that other people choose to ignore.
Don't let it eat you though geezer, the fact you have mental health issues doesn't mean that you can't control it. If you fall into the trap of thinking that you're feeling bad because you have something wrong with you, it's going to be hard to pull yourself out, the best thing you can do is focus on improving the imperfections of your life and putting them in the past.

Yeah man, this is me. Im so conscientious and always thinking, i just cant switch off.

karmacazee wrote:

Depone wrote:cheers guys. to be honest, it felt really weird putting that down on a public dubstep forum
But I needed to vent. Its been real tough, and have never had to deal with a mental illness. For the last 4 months i have not felt myself at all, but im getting somewhere, slowly and surely

So ur saying it's down to a mental health problem? Because, no shit, this happens to me every so often, where my chest feels like it's gradually getting tighter, and I start to get a tingly feeling in my throat and face and then start panicking and hyperventilating, but not as extreme as yours sounds. It's hard to tell people it's happenning to you, because I kind of freeze up and can't really talk.

It comes and goes and has been doing do for about three or four years. I just thought it was a mild allergic reaction to something, causing me to panick!

I've just been kinda trying to ignore it, lol.

Hope you're ok pal.

Yeah i really know what you mean about freezing up. I went for a meal with my dad who was visiting me in london, and I did exactly that, i froze up, had a panic attack at the table. didnt say anything, i just had to get up and walk out the restaurant, then texted my dad to say what had happened. All this sounds worse than it is, but I have had some scary moments ware i passed out in the middle of tesco whilst trying to do the weekly shop.
Big ups to people showing support. Im getting a fitness regime on and eating more healthy from now on.

macc wrote:Sincere best wishes Depone - top fella and top producer.

wayoftheworld wrote: i noticed a biiig diference when i started eating healthy clean and natural foods and shit

I ain't eating shit for anyone, I don't care how healthy it is

ha ha well thanks for letting us all know! i know, i know, eating healthy is a really absurd notion and all but if it at all helped depone then mentioning it would at least be worth it. i know it's not a very popular view but after trying it and seeing results, i can't help but feel you really are what you eat. shit in, shit out....well shit out no matter what, but still it's crazy how many diseases and illnesses are related to shitty eating habits buttttt i know no one wants to hear my granola crunching ass blab on so,. good day!

chin up mate, good on ya for sharing