Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 2:49 pm
.... lol at the linda joke.
why, that's quite marvellousThe Wiggle Baron wrote:Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I'll fuck you with a rake.
Page 2 of 4
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 3:14 pm
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 3:15 pm
a man goes to the doc n says
"doc, i cant stop singing the green green grass of home"
doctor says
"thats the tom jones syndrome"
man says
"is it common?"
doc says
"its not unusual"
answering mashine message - "if you want to buy some ganja, press the hash key"
im so lazy i got a smoke alarm with a snooze button
2male flys are buzzing around looking for good looking female, one spots a real cuttie sitting on a pile of dog shit and flys down towards her "pardon me" he says turning on the charm, "but is this stool taken?"
sorry there crap but im reading mondays daily star
"doc, i cant stop singing the green green grass of home"
doctor says
"thats the tom jones syndrome"
man says
"is it common?"
doc says
"its not unusual"
answering mashine message - "if you want to buy some ganja, press the hash key"
im so lazy i got a smoke alarm with a snooze button
2male flys are buzzing around looking for good looking female, one spots a real cuttie sitting on a pile of dog shit and flys down towards her "pardon me" he says turning on the charm, "but is this stool taken?"
sorry there crap but im reading mondays daily star
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:03 pm
two parrots sat on a perch.
one says to the other
"can you smell fish?"
one says to the other
"can you smell fish?"
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:05 pm
a horse walks into a bar
bartender says "why the long face?"
bartender says "why the long face?"
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:08 pm
Knock Knock
Whos there?
Dr
Dr who
Yeh
Whos there?
Dr
Dr who
Yeh
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:09 pm
Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducked.
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:17 pm
two ships, one carrying blue paint, one carrying red paint collided at sea...
the sailors were marooned
thanks to my mate mike for some of these, doing his best to use up his 10,000 free texts by sending stupid amounts of jokes to everyone
the sailors were marooned
thanks to my mate mike for some of these, doing his best to use up his 10,000 free texts by sending stupid amounts of jokes to everyone
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 4:40 pm
- knock knock
- who's there?
- Dave
- Oh, hello Dave! I forgot you were going to stop by, do come in.
- who's there?
- Dave
- Oh, hello Dave! I forgot you were going to stop by, do come in.
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 5:49 pm
A man and a woman are talking, the woman looks down to see a bulge in the mans trousers. The woman then says to the man 'is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me' the man replies, 'both, im going to rape you'
bit extreme I know but i creased when i heard it
bit extreme I know but i creased when i heard it
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 7:39 pm
lol that's so wrong
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 8:21 pm
who's the coolest guy in the hospital,
the ultra-sound guy
the ultra-sound guy
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 11:49 pm
I've got a good knock knock joke.
You start...
You start...
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 11:51 pm
A man walks into a bar and asks for a double-entendre...
...so the barman gives him one.
...so the barman gives him one.
Posted: Wed Jan 23, 2008 11:54 pm
Or the VIP remix:
A man walks into a bar and asks for a single entendre...
...so the barman bends him over and fucks him in the arse.
A man walks into a bar and asks for a single entendre...
...so the barman bends him over and fucks him in the arse.
Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 12:03 am
A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide.
The librarian says, "F_ck off! You won't bring it back."
The librarian says, "F_ck off! You won't bring it back."
Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 12:09 am
Heath Ledgers autopsy results have come in,
he actually died of alcoholism,
one too many cock sucking cowboys I guess.
he actually died of alcoholism,
one too many cock sucking cowboys I guess.
Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 1:51 am
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Not Maddy Mccann
Who's there?
Not Maddy Mccann
Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 11:01 am
i was going to say that one but thought it a bit rawThump Rat wrote:Knock Knock
Who's there?
Not Maddy Mccann
Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:37 pm
Whats the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer?
A prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.
A prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again.