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i would abolish money and make everyone pay in love and hugs

today at work it was so slow i carved a skull out of this big block of cheese we were supposed to throw out b/c it was out of date

& stuck it in a tub of shredded mozzarella in the back for making pizza with

then i left a note to beware the haunted cheese

#OfficePrankster

m8son wrote:i would abolish money and make everyone pay in love and hugs

Why M8son, why!

I went out on Thursday and didn't drink, some people looked at me like I was a leper or something

lol pussy^

SCope13 wrote:True. Definitely would have some people put on a bit of a more intensive program (ie white collar criminals, military people, government workers, fortune 500 execs etc)

lol cringe

DiegoSapiens wrote:

SCope13 wrote:True. Definitely would have some people put on a bit of a more intensive program (ie white collar criminals, military people, government workers, fortune 500 execs etc)

lol cringe

DOWN WITH THE BOURGEOISIE

SCope13 wrote:Nah, I'd give everyone a chance to grow out of their racist... attitudes.

ASIAN

Had one of those "You know you live in New York City when..." moments today.

I was sitting on the train when this guy comes storming on with his pants real low. He walks past me and sits one bench down from me, with the door space separating our, and a couple of seconds after he sits down, the lady in the couple gets up and grabs her boyfriend saying "we need to move... WE NEED TO MOVE", and starts making way for the opposite end of the carriage. After they got past me and I could see the guy, he was just sitting there having what looked like a pretend-wank so I laughed at her reaction and resumed my silence.

After a while the train stops and I look over to the couple and notice that she's growing in distress, so much so that they switch carriages, so I look back and this guy has whipped his knob out and is going at it with himself, no holds barred. I started laughing again, out of shock more than anything else, and the woman sitting across from me looks at me with a 'why're you laughing?' kind of expression on her face, I look at the floor in the opposite direction to the guy, she then looks in the guy's general direction and snaps her head back. At this point she at least looked shocked.

A couple of moments later, I look up to find her trying to take pictures of him. Naturally I laughed at her and when she noticed me laughing she froze again and started whispering about how crazy he was, I kind of gave her a look that said 'you're the one snapping photos' and then I said "Yeah, well what're you gonna do?"

A little while after that, 7 or 8 minutes into his session, he decides to take the time to make an announcement to the rest of the passengers that he was "jus' bussin' a nut" and that "there's nothing wrong with bussin' a nut". In making this announcement, he wakes up the girl who's sitting in front of him sleeping. She too makes a run for it, she ends up sitting next to me and sobs quietly into her book.


tl;dr
A man was wanking on the train today. The woman in front of me took pictures. The woman in front of him had a nervous breakdown. I laughed. I texted a friend about it and he laughed too.

there was a girl sleeping by him and he had his dick out?

dam that is something from a porno

DiegoSapiens wrote:

SCope13 wrote:True. Definitely would have some people put on a bit of a more intensive program (ie white collar criminals, military people, government workers, fortune 500 execs etc)

lol cringe

capitalist swine over here beggin for the "intensive" re-education program.

scope diego is an anarchist lol

I was being tounge n cheek mostly. and also yeah anarchists are comrades but they better not try to pull any of the that pacifism bullshit. Plus they have a few mistaken ideas, but they could possibly be reconciled.

SCope13 wrote:Plus they have a few mistaken ideas, but they could possibly be reconciled.

they'll be fine once they find jesus

Bro, Jebzus is only:



or



Therefor all belief in Jebzus is outlawed. A kidney and your right cornea will be harvested to pay your debt to society.

Terpit wrote:I went out on Thursday and didn't drink, some people looked at me like I was a leper or something

fuck em

I swear when I stopped drinking, it was like Capuchin monkeys would descend from every dark concavity and throw drinks at me. Like where were the fucking Capuchin's when I was drinking?

some people found it offensive lol, or didn't believe me

if u aint got any money its a great way to get pissed just go around telling everyone your not drinking/not drunk and they will all offer to buy you a drink

Had this dude begging me to take this twentyfour pack... what don't you understand about I don't drink, bearded hipster?