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To set the background a bit.....

Zombies have happened. Whether it's due to a virus, misfiring satellite or whatever, zombies are happening. The population is rapidly becoming infected, and you're one of the survivors. Your main priorities are getting somewhere safe, sorting out food and keeping yourself safe. Or whatever your priorities would be in this situation.

Things to bear in mind;

* Major cities have become gridlocked as people abandon their cars and flee - therefore, transport by car in major metropolitan areas is impossible
* You have access to one handheld projectile weapon, inc. guns, but nothing bigger than a shotgun. Chainsaws are possible, but require fuel.
* Fresh running water is still available, as is electricity in towns with a pre zombie attack population of over 50,000 people


So....

What would you do?
Where would you go?
Why would you go there?
How would you get there?

And most importantly, how would you survive?

I own a firearm and work in a bomb proof building with keycard access and secure underground vaults (which I can get to via a variety of different routes from my house in 20 minutes). There are large stores of food and water, heating, aircon and the building has several backup generators. It's 8 stories high and gives a pretty decent 360 view of the city. I'm pretty sure that's me covered but if it all goes tits up I can just stand with my back to the sea until all my ammo is gone.
I think I'm going to be ok

inject my self with the virus and become alice from resident evil



Except I would have a armani suit on instead. And a massive zombie penis

Or

Steal an oil tanker and drive to easter island or other inhabited island somewhere in the world.

In reality

Nick a big fuck off range rover from the dealership down the road and flee to a remote part of the french countryside in the south of the country.

I went there recently and know exactly where to go.

There is a road section that goes along side the channel tunnel. ssh

Plenty of animals around and I would soon get to grips with killing them from food.

Lock myself in a lidl.

Wub what kind of zombies are we talking about ....

Sean of the dead or 28 days later because fuck zombies that can sprint!

But still...

-Go down to the tesco extra down the road
-fight of zombies with a tekken style fighting cut scene.

Go into tesco in stealth mode take all the dry food / bottle water/fuel/wood and other essentials. Find a delivery van or 4x4 gtfo out there , go back home get my laptop , headphones , phone call most important people in my phone book too see if there are any survivors. Try find survivors in my estate , if i find a hot blonde chick then sick..... but if not i flee into the country preferably by the coast or dock if there are any boats. find a decent size house not to small in case the zombies find it and i have not time to escape or to big so i don't know if they are already in their .......

- Barricade all downstairs doors and windows
- Block the stairs

Live upstairs , try not to draw attention to the house keeping quite at night , conserving ammo just in case , if their is still electricity plug in laptop open ableton and make zombie dubstep.


^ been planing for a zombie apocalypse for years .. dont watch

stop for a second and think, fuck this looks like that rave where everyone was on k, then follow standard procedures of stocking up munch/drink.
play some of Zomby's tunes backwards see if has an effect on the infected - fails.
make a tune called 'zombie takeover', realise that it's the best tune i've ever wrote.
shitloada zombies blast throught the wall, knock my computer over - anger arises due to forgetting to save project, pull out my shotty, blat a few.

then facepalm because i just got bitten from behind.







i wouldn't survive long. few hours.

I for one, welcome our new zombie overlords.

Always wear a seatbelt

Go wherever Dubluke is.

Or (and i'm going to assume is slow zombies), if shit kicked off at night, go to my local Sainsburys where all the shutters would be down. I know how to get in through the roof though so i'd need my rope from the garage. While in my garage I may as well bring a few axes.. Sainsburys is only a few minutes down the road, it's secure and it's got food/water. The night staff might be a problem but nothing that can't be 'handled'. Either control them with my superior intellect or..... well..... fuck you! It's a fucking zombie apocalypse! Shit had to happen eventually.

If they are fast zombies I would probably take a knife with me into my loft and there, amongst all the toys and trinkets from my childhood and early life, I would

Equip myself with:

Benchmade knife collection
Fishing nets
Couple sheep
Sexy man
Head out to Grímsey Island

Wait until all survivors have been killed, assuming the zombies haven't been able to reach me in my isolated location.. birth my own army of rebels. Launch massive counterattack.

cityzen wrote: may as well bring a few axes..

I'd stick with blunt force trauma weapons - baseball bat ideally.

Any sharp edged weapons that cut and you've got a higher chance of infection being spread as you hack at them.

gather together a small group of armed survivors, travel the country taking hostages and then when we have enough attempt to negotiate with the zombies i.e. we will supply you humans if you let us live.

Go about my usual day to day buisness. I live in Hounslow you see so I cant see allot changing if there was an outbreak.

wub wrote:

cityzen wrote: may as well bring a few axes..

I'd stick with blunt force trauma weapons - baseball bat ideally.

Any sharp edged weapons that cut and you've got a higher chance of infection being spread as you hack at them.

Beating a zombie with a bat is sloppy..wouldn't there be a high chance of getting infected as you're bashing it's skull in..goo and blood everywhere..good chance of it landing on you..?

Badman Juice wrote:gather together a small group of armed survivors, travel the country taking hostages and then when we have enough attempt to negotiate with the zombies i.e. we will supply you humans if you let us live.

can't trust zombies to stick to their word

if i was running- head for a well stocked sailing boat

if i was fighting- i'd try and make it to the nearest army base, via farms to try and get hold of a shotgun, id be travelling in one of those off road tree surgeon trucks- back filled with chainsaws n all.

LACE wrote:

wub wrote:

cityzen wrote: may as well bring a few axes..

I'd stick with blunt force trauma weapons - baseball bat ideally.

Any sharp edged weapons that cut and you've got a higher chance of infection being spread as you hack at them.

Beating a zombie with a bat is sloppy..wouldn't there be a high chance of getting infected as you're bashing it's skull in..goo and blood everywhere..good chance of it landing on you..?

You'd have to just make sure your eyes and mouth are closed. Like a zombie pinata.

cityzen wrote:Go wherever Dubluke is.

haha beat me to it. that man has spent far too much time thinking about this

i'd have thought a spear would be ideal for zombie head smashing as you can penetrate the skull (no homo) from a distance and without splatter, or if you can get to a museum then a halberd would be pretty boss



you'd probably need a backup though in case you're stupid enough to let them get up close

badger wrote:you'd probably need a backup though in case you're stupid enough to let them get up close

That's when the Apokatana comes in handy:



From this cool website

wub wrote:

cityzen wrote: may as well bring a few axes..

I'd stick with blunt force trauma weapons - baseball bat ideally.

Any sharp edged weapons that cut and you've got a higher chance of infection being spread as you hack at them.

They aren't double edged battle axes - they have blunt sides too. Best of both worlds. Proper brain destroying material. They can do everything you'd want a baseball bat to do plus cut. You keep your bat.
That reminds me, i'd also bring my WW1 officers sword. If i'm going into battle then i'd like to have my sword. Again, it'd make short work of a zombies brain.

Pick up one of my 1210's and use it in a cricket bat fashion. Everyone knows 1210's are indestructible..