Thanks for the feedback people, you're very kind.
It's harder than it looks to make the vocals sit properly -- especially when they're taken from low-bit rate mp3s of a taped phone conversation and our of laziness you split them across two tracks, one of which has a send, instead of drawing in all the automation

.
I suspect the snare got boosted when I made the file loud enough to come across in an mp3, but it's certainly a pretty splashy reverb on it.
Getting the bass right is just so hard isn't it? And so dependent on how loud you're monitoring. On the studio speakers it's mega; on the hifi downstairs it's kinda weak. I'd like to add some bass harmonics to take it into the low mid-range, but when I tried that it just muddied the sound something rotten.
If no-one clocks where the sample came from by Friday I'll post up the details here with a link. I'm pretty sure Autonomic and Boomnoise will get it...